Friday, January 23, 2009

Music Fun

I saw someone do this on Facebook. Gave it a whirl. Pretty interesting stuff here. And no, I didn't cheat.


1 Put your ipod or other music player on shuffle
2 For each question, press the next button to get your answer
3 You must write that song name down (no matter how silly it sounds)

-Centerfield (John Folgerty)

-Cream (Prince)

-Promises In The Dark (Pat Benatar)

-Witchy Woman (The Eagles)

-I’d Die For You (Candlebox)

-How Great Thou Art (Gospel)

-Saturday Night Fever (The Bee Gees)

WHAT IS 2+2?
-Creep (Stone Temple Pilots)

-Barbara Ann (The Beach Boys)

-Livin’ On The Edge (Aerosmith)

-The Way You Move (Outkast)

-Funkytown (Lipps Inc)

-How You Ever Really Loved A Woman (Daughtry from AI)

-Surf City (The Beach Boys)

-Hold Out Your Hand (Nickleback)

-Since You’ve Been Gone (Kelly Clarkson)

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Culinary Adventures

We decided to eat out tonight. We owed my husband a dinner out so we told him he could chose the place and we would go without complaint. For many reasons, this is his night and it needs to be right.

He decided to step out of the box and try someplace new. He consulted a friend who shall remain nameless. This friend lives in HB, is on a budget like us, and has young kids. Jon asked for a recommendation for good Chinese food, kid friendly with reasonable prices. The friend was quick to respond with the name of a local place that will also remain nameless. This friend likes to eat out and has really good taste in restaurants so we thought this must be the place for us!!

When we walked in there were only 2 tables seated in the large restaurant…bad sign. But one of them was a family so we weren’t too worried yet. As we waited to order (about 10 minutes), we noticed the other table storm out for unknown reasons. They had received their crunchy noodles and dipping sauce (kinda like chips/salsa at Mexican joints) but had no drinks on the table…not a good sign, looks like service was slow. The place began to fill up…good sign. When we received our noodles, they were stale. The kids didn’t mind and they were really hungry so we kept them (although I did notice the table next to us sent theirs back and then didn’t like the replacements either…bad sign)

I got my water, the glass had lipstick on it. Not a huge deal…it happens. Got our soup, my spoon some type of food still on it…looked like a big booger. Sent that back too. Got our appetizers, Dylan grabbed an egg roll, and a long black hair. Now things are getting icky. While we were waiting on the food, Jon took the kids to the bathroom and we tried playing some games. The kids were restless, there was a lot of whining and it was starting to fall apart. At this point, our friend texts to see how we like the restaurant. We don’t answer that question. We avoid it by talking about how the kids are bugging us and will they take them off our hands. (turns out they can’t because they are having a hot date for their anniversary. But remember, I will not tell you who they are so don’t ask).

Dinner arrives. It was ummm…fair? I guess I can call it that. There was little flavor. Kung Pow had now “pow”, sweet and spicy had no “spicy” and the broccoli chicken, guess you can’t crew that up much. The fried rice was good though. But overall…not really good Chinese food. Not really good food period. In fact, about half way through I literally start to feel ill. The kids ate the white rice and broccoli, didn’t like anything else we offered. It looks like I am going to be making them dinner after all. Throughout the meal we got several more texts from this friend and his wife. Through the “conversation” it was revealed that neither of them had eaten there since High School…18 years ago! WE CAN TELL! This is not the type of place they would go, or take their kids, or ever recommend to anyone. It’s dirty, it’s old and it is not worth the money.

All of a sudden, Dylan has to go…NOW! Jon says “you take him, the men’s bathroom was disgusting”. Nice. We take Megan with us. The women’s bathroom…also disgusting. Megan went while Dylan did the dance and I cleaned the light switch with a wet paper towel. Whatever nastyness was on there was not coming off. I immediately washed my hands and vowed to leave the light on when we left. Dylan asked for Privacy which meant #2. I helped Megan wash her hands and started gagging at how gross the sink was. Dirty! Just dirty! I wouldn’t let her touch anything while we waited. I was starting to feel worse. The mood was lightened when Dyaln sighed “Oh Poop” after a big plop. We giggled. His belly was not happy. It was gross. He flushed. It rose. We laughed and backed away. We tried again. It rose again. The dirty, disgusting toilet was not going to take the poop. I told the kids “just pretend it didn’t happen. If Daddy has paid the bill we can run out of here and they will never know it was us.” And that’s exactly what we did.

I am getting more and more queezy each minute. Jon drove separate from us so he leaves while we eat our fortune cookies (the best part of our meal by far!). As we are pulling out of the parking lot, Megan screams “I have to go poop right now and it is an emergency” SCREAMS! I said “you have to wait until we get home because we are not going back in there!” She starts crying the words you never want to hear “Mommy, I swear it is an emergency. I am going to poop my pants”. She was serious. I pulled into In-N-Out and we ran in while she literally held her hand over her rear. She went. Again, it wasn’t pretty. I am gagging again. My belly is getting worse. She says “Mommy, my belly did not like that food at all”. Mine neither.

On the drive home I have three nasty burps which pretty much are the prelude to a violent eruption of the belly, through the mouth. When we walk in, Jon announces his eyes hurt, from pushing out all the vomit. Guess his belly didn’t like it either. Now I really want to blow. I am gurgling and burping and just…ICK! Unfortunately for me, my body does not like to vomit. I sit here 2 hours later still feeling ill and wanting to be D-O-N-E with that meal. Just burped again.

The evening wasn’t perfect for my hubby, but it was memorable. Burped again.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Thirty Five...

...And Still Alive!


I have had some memorable birthdays in the past.

There was my 14th birthday when my mom/hairstylist gave me a HORRIBLE perm, cut my hair SUPER short and then threw me a surprise party! It wasn't pretty. Although I was totally blindsided by the party. That part was fun (once my entire 8th grade class got over the SHOCK of my hair!!)

There was my 6th birthday when we had the party at Chuckee Cheeses. My BEST friend showed up in her BEST party dress and fancy shoes. She cried for and hour when she saw we were all in jeans. My step-dad nick named her Mun Chee Chee because she looked so cute like one of those dolls (this continued to be her nick name for the next 20 years!). She gave me a Sesame Street Record that we would listen to for hours! I still have it! Awwww.... (unfortunately the last time I saw her 9 years ago she asked me to do something immoral. I said no. That was the last time we spoke. sniff sniff.)

There was my 21st birthday in Vegas (the time I REALLY turned 21). I slept in the car in the parking lot of the hotel because my friends were being total asses and I had to get away from them.

There was my 20th birthday when we couldn't get into the Eagles Hell Freezes Over concert because 2 of our 4 tickets were fake. As I pitched a fit in the parking lot, a cop grabbed my boobs and told me to chill out. (I was VIOLATED!) Since we'd rented a limo we had to all leave together and forfeit our good tickets. We went to TGI Fridays where my friend got trashed. We spent the 2 next hours hosing vomit off her driveway, her neighbors lawn, her bedroom floor. Ick.

There was my 30th birthday when I babysat all the nieces and nephews because Jon and his sisters had to go to a funeral.

There was my 27th birthday when I was in the hospital after delivering Dylan. I spent the majority of the morning vomiting from the anesthesia. My step-mom got in trouble for lighting a candle and singing me happy birthday (something about fire and oxygen tanks. Big deal). I burst into tears for no reason (the nurse said something about my milk coming in but I think it was because someone took all the estrogen in the entire COUNTRY and shoved it into my body). Then the Nazi nurse molested me while trying to show me how to nurse my baby. She was creepy.

There was my 32nd birthday when my Mom called me up and said "What are you doing for your BIG 30th?!" was two years ago...thanks for noticing Mom.

So I figured it was up to me to make my 35th memorable. The odds were stacked against me. The kids had school, I had school, and Jon had to work. Not much to do with that. BUT I did my best to have "me" day.

I woke up to the same mess I had left when I went to bed. The birthday fairy hadn't come. Although the house was still decorated form when she appeared for Dylan's birthday so at least it felt festive. My kids didn't remember it was my birthday. No biggie, except that meant they were on their usual behavior which included not listening to me, not clearing their plates and bickering about EVERYTHING! Off to a good start huh?!

I took the kids to school and took myself for an awesome bike ride. I rode to the beach, spent some time at the water enjoying the AMAZING day God had created (just for me I'm sure!). Catalina was at my fingertips, the weather was a perfect 75 degrees and life was good. Riding back up the trail with the ocean at my back, I enjoyed the amazing view of the snow capped mountains. I rode up to the park and rode the dirt trails and jumps for a little while.

After riding home I organized a few things for school, packed up and headed to Disneyland (where it was a not so perfect 88 degrees). Since it was my birthday and I am a pass holder, I got a "Fun Card" for $69! YES! Free money! I browsed World of Disney but nothing really grabbed me. I did do a bit of shopping for some upcoming birthdays but I spent real money on way was I spending my free birthday money!

I decided to treat myself to a late lunch. I have been craving Mexican since losing weight but have never let myself indulge. I decided it was time. But I couldn't fathom sitting alone in a restaurant on my birthday so I opted to go to their carryout window and enjoy a little people watching. Bad move. First, the takeout window did not serve the good stuff. The food was made with nacho cheese, fake guacamole and chips straight off the shelf at Smart and Final. Big disappointment. A nice (and by nice I mean strange) lady sat down in my personal space and whipped out her own beverages, a mini DVD player and kicked back with her cowboy boots on the table. She tried to engage me in some type of conversation about "weed" and the very good possibility we would both leave with a contact high from all the people smoking weed around us. We were completely alone and I didn't smell a thing. Time to go.

I drove to school for braille class. My classroom is right next door to my step-mom's office so I stopped in to say Hi. While I was there the following happened
phone rings
Her office Mate answers the phone
"Oh hello Vinnie" (my brother)
"Yes, Diane AND Gina are right here"
"Are you sure that's who you are calling for"
"You know, don't you want to talk to your sister instead of Diane?"
"Vinnie, I am trying to cover for you. Don't you want to wish your sister a happy birthday?"
So I get on the phone and listen to my brother scramble to cover up for the fact he had no idea it was my birthday. He said something about calling me being on his "to do list" (I know him better than that) and something else about not being able to remember me because his dryer broke. OK...Sibling #1...busted.

I suffered through an INSANELY boring guest speaker. I really like this class but the speaker just did nothing for me. Not the way I really wanted to spend my evening.

When I got home, I had to pee so badly. I ran to the bathroom and found my birthday surprise...a visit from an old relative (let's just say I'm not pregnant...happy birthday to me! NOT!)

But things were looking up...the birthday fairy had come with her! YAY! My kids had made me some cards and decorated my bedroom all by themselves. Look what a good job they did!

My amazing husband had cleaned the house and started laundry (YES!) He was also making me an artichoke and some spinach dip. I enjoyed every fattening bite. We drank a bottle of champagne and spent some time together. It was a great ending to a birthday that I can't exactly call memorable, but it was as good as it can get under the circumstances.

A few side notes.

Another shout out to my Mom. TODAY she sent me a very nice e-card talking all about how January 14th is the most important day of her life and I am he best thing that happened to her. I was so planned and wanted and yadda yadda yadda. Hey Mom, the most important day of your life was YESTERDAY!!! I love you Mom! Thanks for always thinking about me (even if it is always a tad bit late!)

An honorable mention to my other brother who called me today and said he knew it was yesterday but he still wanted to wish me a Happy Birthday. sweet.

And a special thank you to my baby sister who was my only sibling to remember me! She rocks! WAIT..actually I called her to ask her about the weather. Ah Hem.....

FINAL NOTE: From the pages of Balloon Babes (a new porno magazine)...I give you..ME!

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

A Shout Out

I just want to give a "shout out" to my hubby. He is spending his entire day off doing projects around the house. SO FAR he has cleaned the gutters, built a basketball hoop and taken down the Christmas Lights. He is a stud. And I thank him!

God Is Testing Me

This year, I decided to try to be a nicer person. In general I am really nice, I babysit on a moments notice, I cover for people at school events, I take food to sick families, I volunteer for everything...I am your go to girl! But there are things that I am just not very nice about. It is in those ways I hope to change and become a better person this year. For example, I will no longer assume you are a bad mother when you are dragging your screaming child around Target by their hair...I will just know you are having a bad day and pray it gets better. I will no longer call you a dumb ass when you forget to pick up your kids from school...or even forget that today is a school day. I will simply remember that you have been busy volunteering at some very important event and your child was not in the forefront of your mind. The biggest way I am challenging myself to be nicer this year is to stop laughing at people when they fall down (or even stumble). I am trying not to laugh now just typing this because to me, it is simply funny when people trip. I am mean. I know it. But I am working on it. Since making this commitment, I feel like God is testing me. Everywhere I go He is just knocking people down right in front of me. Seriously! It happened 3 times in two days...and I didn't even crack a smile. I did not laugh at the lady who ran across the auditorium to turn in her offering at Church and then turned around and tripped right into the front row of seats. That was really hard for me! But I did it! I just said WOW! She is really anxious to give! At the bank this guy waited for me to cross the parking lot and get in my car before pulling into his spot. I was thinking what a nice guy he is when he stepped out of his car and ate it on the speed bump in the parking lot. I just pulled out and drove away, still thinking he must be a nice guy (with a brand new hole in his jeans)Then yesterday when the stud in the tank top with his guns blazing (you know the type) was rushing down the sidewalk and stepped to the curb to pass a group of old people walking really slow fell off the curb and bumped into a car and then pretended he was going to open the back door anyway...I didn't even chuckle. I just thought, he is in good shape (for someone who can't walk) UH OH! I feel myself slipping already! I am trying really hard not to laugh at these misfortunes. My question is...if I laugh 10 minutes later when I replay it in my mind does it count?? How about 5 or even 10 years later when I retell the stories of my husband falling on his ass twice and I laugh so hard I pee my pants...does that count? Does it make it even worse that one of the times he fell, I wasn't even there to witness it but it STILL makes me laugh? Seriously! This is a hard hard task for me. But you can help me...please don't ever fall in front of me. It is even funnier when it is someone I know! You all can help me by just staying on your feet, watching for imaginary pebbles in the road, staying on the curb and picking up your feet when you walk! Thank you for your assistance!

Saturday, January 3, 2009

You Know Me...

...full of random thoughts.

Did you know Target gives you a 5c discount for every reusable bag you bring in on your shopping trip? I am going to save millions this year!

Does anyone (in driving distance) want to read this book?

It is not my type of story but it is a nice heartwarming book. My MIL left it here for me to read so it is time to pass it along.

I am so glad today looks like this:
I want to play games with my kids all day and enjoy having Christmas behind us. On the agenda, Farkle, Fancy Nancy Puzzle, Legos, Picturika and of course some Wii. I am thinking I need to take them down in a little Mario Kart racing.

I can't wait for Monday! The rugrats will be back in school! I love schedules and routines. I do not function well with no plan. I am also looking forward to having them out of the house because I am tired of cleaning. I have vacuumed, mopped and/or swept every day since they went on break. I had forgotten how many crumbs these guys leave behind all day long! I also can't wait to go back to the gym. My kids hate the child care there so I am locked out until they are back in school. 2 days and counting!

We saw some movies this break:
Bedtime Stories (two thumbs up)
Marley and Me (cute romantic comedy...not for kids)
Despareux (eh...I could take it or leave it but I am not much into animated films anyway. The rest of the family liked it)
We rented Step-Brothers (rude, crude and funny. Must have high tolerance for F-bombs)
The kids rented Monster House (they loved it!)
I rented Mamma Mia (I really enjoyed it! Of course I am an Abba fan so it was bound to be good!)

I only had time for this randomness right now. Coming soon:
Christmas Recap
Megan's Birthday
New Years Eve (including incriminating photos!)